Category Archives: Humor

For all humor stories (a la Plop!) that don’t fit into the continuity on any of the Earths.

Captain Carrot and the Zoo Crew: The Sinister Selfies, Chapter 11: Don’t Look

by T Campbell Return to chapter list President Mallard Fillmore drummed his green-feathered fingers on the desk, sweating profusely as he fretted over the situation. “And you’re sure the effect is universal? Just about anyone who sees this image becomes… shall we say… enlightened to the notion that Doctor Hoot knows what’s best for the . . .

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Captain Carrot and the Zoo Crew: The Sinister Selfies, Chapter 10: Change We Can Believe In

by T Campbell Return to chapter list “Fighting me, that’s gonna be a problem for you,” said Chester Cheese, shutting his eyes tight; they were useless against this opponent, anyway. “Alley-Kat-Abra’s been teaching me night-fighting moves. If you don’t know what those are, I’ll explain, using visual aids and tactile stimulation.” “Nice bluff,” came Randall . . .

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Captain Carrot and the Zoo Crew: The Sinister Selfies, Chapter 9: Whoogle Doodle

by T Campbell Return to chapter list “Talk to me, folks. Sergey Bruin is really against the idea of this. He won’t even look at the concepts for it. I want to know if I’m being crazy.” Hairy Sage, the marmoset co-founder of Whoogle and now its CEO, was standing in front of a short . . .

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Captain Carrot and the Zoo Crew: The Sinister Selfies, Chapter 8: Pep Talk

by T Campbell Return to chapter list Please don’t take this the wrong way, Earth-C, thought Captain Carrot as the Starhopper‘s engines went silent, and it settled into geosynchronous orbit. You’re great, really. I just need a little space. Times like this, it was good for his overall mental health that he could make himself . . .

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Captain Carrot and the Zoo Crew: The Sinister Selfies, Chapter 7: Tar Baby

by T Campbell Return to chapter list The Starhopper tore out of the Z-Building like a runaway rocket. Which it was. So that made sense. The force-field had dropped about ten seconds earlier, to everyone’s surprise — everyone’s, that was, but Rex Imperium’s. The Irish setter knew a thing or two about asymmetrical warfare, and . . .

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Captain Carrot and the Zoo Crew: The Sinister Selfies, Chapter 6: Round Two

by T Campbell Return to chapter list Captain Carrot blinked his sore eyes. Everything in his body hurt. But others had it worse, and a hero was basically just someone who thought of others a little bit more than others thought of others. The team had looked better. Alley-Kat-Abra had re-materialized all seven of them . . .

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Captain Carrot and the Zoo Crew: The Sinister Selfies, Chapter 5: The Snare

by T Campbell Return to chapter list In the back row of the Pant-Pantages Theater, Emoticat’s T-shirt also stretched into a smile. A wave of confident euphoria swept across the room, giving the super-villains the confidence they needed to attack the legendary Zoo Crew, and encouraging the Crew members to think they had a chance. . . .

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Captain Carrot and the Zoo Crew: The Sinister Selfies, Chapter 4: By the Beard of Zeu

by T Campbell Return to chapter list Twenty-one seconds after the thunderclaps started, the last wall of the trailer finally blew off, and Pig-Iron and Rubberduck came face to face with Zeu. But not the same Zeu. What Rubberduck saw was a swan whose skin gleamed like opal and alabaster in his three-piece suit, an . . .

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Captain Carrot and the Zoo Crew: The Sinister Selfies, Chapter 3: Crew Cutters

by T Campbell Return to chapter list “ROOOVAAA-AAA-AAA-AAA!” the communicator bellowed. Rova Barkitt was in her full Yankee Poodle costume and riding one of her stripe-slides down Follywood Boulevard. A high-visibility patrol was good for public safety and for her personal brand. She almost lost her balance because of the Captain’s volume, but she took . . .

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Captain Carrot and the Zoo Crew: The Sinister Selfies, Chapter 2: Deep Freeze

by T Campbell Return to chapter list The heroes soon to be known as the Pan-Plastic Four stared at each other, unable to believe the incredible changes racking their animal bodies. Seed Switcher was stretching his wings and neck every which way, like some kind of malleable mallard, and he would soon become known as . . .

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Captain Carrot and the Zoo Crew: The Sinister Selfies, Chapter 1: The Plan

by T Campbell Return to chapter list It began with a Whoogle search and a quiet whimper of despair. Doctor Hoot was out of ideas. The mad orange owl’s laboratory was a monument to his disappointments. Blueprints for demolished giant robots lined the small eat-in kitchen. The snapped remains of his mind-control leashes sat in . . .

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DC Universe: Something Wacky This Way Comes

by Drivtaan, Starsky Hutch 76, Libbylawrence, Brian K. Asbury, Blackwolf247, Comickook and Martin Maenza
DC Universe: Something Wacky This Way Comes: The Five Earths Project
An accident causes Brainiac of the Legion of Doom to become Pulsar Stargroove, rhythmic leader of the Legion of Funk! But as the Legion dominates the music charts, strange events happen all over the country. Another team of super-villains with a weakness for fruit pies form together as the Host of Badness! Meanwhile, the Super Friends welcome Apache Chief to their number, and the Teen Titans lose their memories! Will all these threads come together to form one coherent plot? Not at all! That’s why we called in Drivtaan to wrap it all up in the form of an ultimate musical showdown — a battle of the bands! You don’t want to miss this bizarre and peculiar attempt at humor by the Five Earths writers!

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DC Universe: Something Wacky This Way Comes, Epilogue: Plot Holes

by Drivtaan Return to chapter list Somewhere beyond space and time, a collection of beings gather. They are the shapers of worlds, the authors of destinies, the givers of life; they are know as the Quintessence. Their garments are varied, and their appearances are obscured by ethereal mists. Draw close and listen as these godlike . . .

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DC Universe: Something Wacky This Way Comes, Chapter 8: And the Winner Is

by Drivtaan Return to chapter list The Super Friends seem a little hesitant as they take their place in front of the judges. Off to the side, several members of the Legion of Funk are snickering, and even the Teen Titans aren’t looking at their mentors with much hope. Green Lantern adjusts the microphone in . . .

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DC Universe: Something Wacky This Way Comes, Chapter 7: Battle of the Bands

by Drivtaan Return to chapter list Being the current writer allows me certain bits of information that the characters wouldn’t know, so to move this story along, I give Snapper the location of the Legion of Doom’s… er… I mean the Legion of Funk’s secret headquarters and send him on his way. And lest you . . .

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